Hell's Kitchen - South Park Edition
by PetitAngel1
Summary: Randy is convinced he's a world class chef and to prove it, he's going to enter the TV show 'Hell's Kitchen' in an attempt to win. Of course, he's dragged along his son Stan and his friends to compete alongside him... Rated T for swearing!
1. Arrival of the New Chefs

_**Announcer:**_ **Hell's Kitchen is opening its doors once again and this year, we have decided to let in 16 contestants from a small, little mountain town from nowhere. Its called South Park and the people there have a reputation for being completely out of the norm so expect a season of craziness and complete insanity. Right now, they're on a bus to meet with multiple Michelin Stars Winner: Gordon Ramsey...**

The bus is luxurious and fancy, well in contrast with the usual buses the kids ride upon to school. Everyone is talking casually among each other, many over-confident and not aware of what is to be expected of them.

"Oh my God Stan! Isn't this exciting! Stan! Stan?" Randy exclaims with such glee that one could confuse him for a child who had just been bought an expensive action figure. A cocky grin is plastered on his face. Stan, on the contrary, seems pretty agitated.

* * *

 _(Confessional: Stan Marsh. Age 18)_

 _"I only applied to go on the show because my Dad wouldn't shut the fuck up about it. He doesn't even know how to cook! Like all he does is watch those stupid cooking channels and tries to replicate what they do! Ugh!"_

* * *

Kyle, Kenny and Cartman are chatting to each other next to the father and son duo. Well, arguing is more correct of a word.

"Cartman is going out first! Guarantee it!" Kenny said tiredly, rubbing his eyes.

"Yeah like I'm going to not beat out Kyle! Everyone knows Jews can't cook! Name one chef that's Jewish! You can't can you?" Cartman immediately responded, trying to sound as if he had just outsmarted a supervillian.

"Shut up fatass!" Kyle said as if he was just going through the motions. He seemed fixated on Stan's irritated face as Randy continued to boast his supposed talents.

* * *

 _(Confessional: Randy Marsh. Told us that his Age was 21 but we don't believe him)_

 _"Yeah I cook professionally. Cooked all over the world. It just comes natural to me you know! Some people have the goods and some don't. I'm one of the few who do."_

* * *

As for everyone else, they seemed to be keeping amongst there little friendship groups. Wendy, Bebe and Red were giggling and pointing in the corner. Craig, Tweek, Clyde and Token were discussing the order of who would be eliminated ("Gah I can't go home first! People will make fun of me forever!" cried Tweek, spazzing out at just the idea) and Ike was texting on his phone. Butters was awkwardly fiddling with his fingers on his own while Henrietta smoked a cigarette, rolling her eyes at anyone who dared to look in her own direction.

The final contestant was Jimmy who appears to be the public fan favourite as when the reveal trailer for this season was posted, the comments were filled with how funny and amazing he was. They were all posted a minute apart from each other so take that as you will.

* * *

 _(Confessional: Jimmy Valmer. Age 18)_

 _"I mainly aspire to be a comedian cause I make people laugh, very much. How..How..However I think food can be funny too. Make it taste good but make you laugh at the same time!_

* * *

The journey lasted a little bit longer but finally they arrived at Hell's Kitchen! Everyone got out excitedly (except for Stan) and approached the entrance where the man himself stood waiting.

"Welcome..." but he was immediately cut off.

"OH MY GOD. Guys! It's Chef Ramsey! That's him!" Randy squealed in delight, and even the great chef himself was taken back by the immaturity.

"Mr Marsh. We..." Wendy attempted to but in but to no avail.

"RAMSEY! I've admired you since I was like 5. No, no 4. I'm so gonna impress you and maybe I can be your apprentice and..." but it was now Randy's turn to be interrupted.

"Dude! Shut the fuck up!" Craig spoke up angrily with his cold, nasal voice. Randy went dead quiet, his cheeks red of embarrassment. Ramsey raises his eyebrow for a second, then continued.

"As I was saying, welcome to Hell's Kitchen. I'm not going to waste time so go in there and cook your signature dishes! The competition begins right now!"

* * *

 **A/N:** _I know this is a weird story but hey I was inspired by the Creme Freche episode which is so brilliant! Next chapter will be the signature dishes. This chapter is short due to it just being an introduction but I promise the rest will be longer. :)_

 _Criticism and Reviews would be much appreciated! Who do you think is going to get eliminated first?_

 **Contestants Participaing:**

 **Randy**

 **Stan**

 **Kenny**

 **Token**

 **Craig**

 **Tweek**

 **Kyle**

 **Cartman**

 **Bebe**

 **Butters**

 **Wendy**

 **Red**

 **Ike**

 **Henrietta**

 **Jimmy**

 **Clyde**


	2. Team Sorting and Entering the Kitchen

**Announcer: The chefs have all cooked their signature dishes and are about to show them to the Legendary Chef Gordon Ramsey but they are in for a huge surprise...**

"I don't care about your signature dishes! You're all amateurs! Obviously, they're are shit!" said Ramsey with a smug smile. Murmurs erupted as the residents of South Park seemed extremely irritated that he had just wasted all their time!

* * *

 _(Confessional - Bebe Stevens. Age 18)_

 _"What was the whole point of that? Ugh I made my dish so beautiful and pretty as well."_

* * *

"In fact, I have barely any confidence what so ever. That's why I'm hoping for one of you to surprise me. Dinner Service will begin tonight! As soon as you are sorted into teams and assigned sections, you will be put to work in the kitchen! That will be your first test. Now for teams! Red Team will be Cartman, Kyle (a huge groan erupted), Ike, Wendy, Tweek, Clyde, Jimmy and Butters!" Ramsey announced and no one seemed happy with their teams.

"GAH! What am I supposed to do without Craig? Oh Jesus I can't deal with this man!" cried Tweek emotionally.

"Well at least we already know who's going first!" Wendy said matter-of-factly, her eyes glancing at Cartman.

"I'm happy!" piped up Butters.

"Blue team will be Craig, Stan, Kenny, Henrietta, Red, Bebe, Token and Randy!" said Ramsey. Similar chaos spawned here too...

"What a coincidence. Me and my own son on the same team!" Randy cheered a bit too loudly, doing some sort of celebatory tap dance to show his excitement. Red and Bebe immediatly walked to each other's side. Craig seemed visibly agitated by the fact a certain someone wasn't on his team.

"I can't believe my stupid abusive dad forced me to come here. He could never fucking understand me. Wants to make my life into a barbie doll dream world. So clueless for fuck sake." muttered Henrietta, taking a puff from her cigarette. After the teams settled, Ramsey spoke up.

"What are you guys waiting for? A hot chocolate? Fuck off into the kitchen!" and everyone quickly followed suite on his instructions, entering the restaurant for the very first time. It was quite menacing with all the fire and the prominence of the colour red. Quickly the teams divided into their own kitchens...

* * *

 **Announcer: The doors of Hell's Kitchen are about to open and already leaders are starting to emerge in both teams...**

 **Red Kitchen:**

"Let's be honest here! I'm the only one here who is capable of leading here. In this case, I want to work on the dessert station!" Cartman proudly stated as if he had just been appointed Emperor of the world. He raised his eyebrows at everyone else, their faces showing anything but agreement.

"Yeah so you can eat everything there!" Kyle interrupted, almost gagging at the thought of Cartman having any leadership responsibility.

"I think I should be leader. I'm already head of student council..." but she didn't get far into her sentence.

"BOO WENDY BOO!" Cartman shouted obnoxiously. Wendy growled at the irritating buffoon, trying her best to not get visibly upset.

* * *

(Confessional - Wendy Testaburger. Age 18)

"As long as that monstrosity is on our team, winning is going to be impossible. Why did he have to be on my team.."

* * *

 **Announcer: As things heat up in the Red Kitchen, the Blue Kitchen seems quite organised.**

"I will be the leader of this glorious team. With me, we will travel the stars and reach impossible heights." Randy said dreamily but it seemed everyone else was too fixated on their stations to care about what he was saying.

"Where's the scallops?" Token asked, his eyes bewildered and confused. Red and Bebe were chatting together over by the dessert station.

"You do the oven stuff and I'll do the serving and cutting." Craig blankly said to Henrietta who sighed tiredly but Craig knew she didn't care what she had to do. As both kitchens got into place, Chef Ramsey walked over into the middle.

"Chef JP! Open Hell's Kitchen!"

"Oh Jesus!" cried Tweek.

"Geez Louise." panicked Butters.

"Pirate!" yelled Ike.

* * *

 **A/N:** _Next Chapter will be the first service and first elimination. Wonder who you think will go first? Remember no one is off limits._

 _Randy is best cook EVAR!_


End file.
